Call for an appointment @ 446-1313.

A young man at this construction site was bragging that he could outdo anyone based on his strength. He especially made fun of one of the older workman. After several minutes, the older worker had enough. 
"Why don't you put your money where you mouth is?" he said. "I'll bet a week's wages that I can haul something in a wheelbarrow over to the other building that you won't be able to wheel back." 
"You're on, old man," the young man replied. "Let's see what you've got." 
The old man reached out and grabbed the wheelbarrow by the handles. Then nodding to the young man, he said with a smile, "All right. Get in."

A shopkeeper was dismayed when a brand new business much like his own
opened up next door and erected a huge sign which read 'BEST DEALS.'

He was horrified when another competitor opened up on his right, and
announced its arrival with an even larger sign, reading 'LOWEST PRICES.'

The shopkeeper panicked, until he got an idea. He put the biggest sign
of all over his own shop. It read: 'MAIN ENTRANCE'

A frenchman, and englishman and a new yorker are traveling through the amazon jungle when they're captured by a local tribe.  The chief tells them "the bad news is we got you, we're going to kill you and make canoes out of your skin.  The good news is you get to decide how you want to die"

The Frenchman says "I take zee poision" and downing the poision says "Vive La France" and dies. 

The Englishman says "I'll take the pistol"  and...."Long live the queen" bang...dead.

The New Yorker says "gimme a fork" and starts stabbing himself everywhere, blood gushing out of all the little holes.  The chief screams "what are you doing?" and he says "Eh so much for ya fu@kin canoe der a$$hole!"